There comes a time or times in the life of a man or woman where one needs to call themselves to a meeting. My brother taught me that phrase. Have a little tête- à- tête with yourself and analyse your life through your own eyes or a magnifying glass if you so wish ,then see if you find yourself wanting.
Its never an easy thing to do, it might take a long time to actually even get round to starting it in the first place. Usually, closets have to be opened, skeletons unearthed and the whole thing gets extremely messy and draining. Exhausting even. But one thing remains, it has to be done.
It’s usually in these moments that I choose to confront all those questions and situations that I have seemingly long forgotten but still have had a huge impact in my life.It is in these moments that I embrace my shortcomings not in a bid to justify my actions but to simply put them behind me and move forward. It is also in these moments that I admit how I have been faced with moments of utter hopelessness and despair but still managed to pull through. So its not all gloom doom these meetings, I will allow to pat myself on the back sometimes.
The essence of these meetings and no, they are not numerous , is to fully open myself up and understand exactly what my brain,heart and body are speaking to me. Then, I’m in a better position to make sound decisions. But as with every contingency meeting, the moments I call myself for private meetings usually aren’t the best of times. Maybe its my way of ensuring I still keep the hope and don’t get buried in my own less than perfect situations.
I have learnt the importance of these meetings so I don’t take them lightly. Usually I’ll have a pen and notebook to jot down the important points or in less serious situations, just pointers in my head. The beauty though, is at the very end, after all is said and done I know my demons are halfway vanquished. Some get fully vanquished. Its a very comforting feeling and there’s nothing as comforting as finding solace in your own thoughts and feelings. Once I have done that, I can begin to see the silver lining and beyond it some rays of sunshine.